P0rn and Trust

This morning I come across an interesting topic: In a relationship is viewing porn healthy or unhealthy?


I'm away from home a lot and I'm blessed with having a girlfriend both understanding and open-minded who trusts me. I in-turn trust her, because we have to.  I have faith that she won't abuse my long absences by bringing other men into our bed, and she has to believe that I won't use my time away from her to find other women either.  With this in mind, we have a very easy going view of pornography, it's packed up in my suitcase for my trips without a worry.  There is no secrecy about it, no guilt, and in fact should I forget to pack it she has in the past reminded me herself. 

I feel that we aren't isolated in this treatment.  Our married friends have similar Lessee Faire views on adult entertainment, and in-general I think that Canadians are fairly easy going about the whole thing, however this may just be an example of the company I keep.

So I ask you the reader:  When in a relationship, is porn healthy or unhealthy?

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Advertisements

About Helmsman

Importing a Vox Blog.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to P0rn and Trust

  1. Street Vein says:

    I especially admire the couples who successfully sell their personal sex lives on the internet to earn a lucrative living. They figure, "hey we're fucking anyway… why not videotape it and sell it?" — easily dismissing any social criticisms from puritans while they enjoy porn-paid vacations to Europe.

  2. jaklumen says:

    I would say it depends on the content of the porn and how it's being used (which I think others have touched on).@brownamazon, Lightchaser: as long is it doesn't replace real intimacytried to replace intimacy with me with porn… that's where the buck stopsI think that's an excellent point. I've read a number of sentiments from folks basically saying it "helps them get in the mood", and it is basically used as a means to arousal.The real question, then, is whether or not you are dependent on using it for that arousal.@CareaBearaSara: Gives People With Less Experience, New Ideas To Bring Into Their RelationshipsI mentioned content– here's where I would say "instructional videos" come in. Yes, big-name porn stars– Nina Hartley being one– have made such. Sometimes, there's just no substitute for an explicit demonstration, and such media is designed for just that purpose.@Lightchaser, again: If he doesn't look at the porn I'm sure he's perfectly capable of cooking up some raunchy fantasies in his head in any case.Returning to the other thought that porn should not replace intimacy, I ask: Now, what would stop a couple from exchanging "home-made porn" when they are apart? That covers a lot of ground– it may be as simple as a letter or a phone call as well as pictures and video. Then there is no question that one's partner is the subject here, and is very much a part of the fantasy and autoeroticism.(To put it in more blunt terms, I'm more in favor of the idea that you masturbate to something your girlfriend put together.)I'm not sure if you have concerns with privacy and security– obviously, those feeling exhibitionist and wanting to turn a profit (as Street Vein suggests) would be less concerned.I chose to duck answering the question directly, because I didn't think a discussion concerning the morality of porn would be helpful or useful. You said you were fine with it, so I went from there.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s