Okay… it's not really my defibrillator… it belongs to the company, but it is mine to look after right now. And should someone go into arrest on my watch it will be my responsibility to revive them if possible.
The thing about these Automatic External Defib's (AED's) is that they're so foolproof a child can use them. When you open them up a voice prompts you to place the pads with little diagrams showing where to put them. Proper placement is important. The electrical current needs to travel through the heart from one direction to another, but the AED will know if you put them in the wrong spots and it'll tell you so.
Then it analyzes heart rhythm and will determine the degree of shock needed… so I don't get to act all dramatic and demand the amps be increased like some doctor out of an early 90's medical drama, and the pads are actually ones that just stick onto the chest, so I don't get to hold them and look cool either… guess I'll just have to console myself with just saving a coworker's life.
If you've never seen these things before, I can mention an example that most people have probably seen. In the latest bond movie Casino Royale, the defibrillator that bond uses in his car is pretty much exactly how much one of these works. Though I think using one on yourself is a bit of a stretch…